Hospitality Defined (It May Be Different Than What You Think)

What do you think of when you hear the word “hospitality”? Do you get an image of people gathered around a table, food in front of them, and a great time shared with friends? Does “spiritual gift” enter your mind or, even, the words “host/hostess”?

My mom and dad were often opening their home while I was growing up (they still are!). They housed music groups who sang at their church or missionaries who came into town. They invited people over for lunch after church or on a holiday, if they didn’t have family in town. Their home (and hearts) were open and dedicated to serving God and reaching out to others.

I read a devotional the other day about hospitality, and it got me thinking.

In Romans 12, Paul lists a number of things that should be part of a believer’s life, and hospitality is one of them! It’s not a gift given to some; it’s a command for all believers! Believers in Christ have received the gift of the Spirit of God (Eph. 1:12-14); the Spirit enables all believers to do all of the things listed below in order to bring God glory, that others will have a positive opinion about Him through encountering us!

“Love each other with genuine affection, and take delight in honoring each other. Never be lazy, but work hard and serve the Lord enthusiastically. Rejoice in our confident hope. Be patient in trouble, and keep on praying. When God’s people are in need, be ready to help them. Always be eager to practice hospitality. Bless those who persecute you. Don’t curse them; pray that God will bless them.

Romans 12:10-14 NLT

And this isn’t even all of the directives in this section!

So, this is the part that got me the most: As I read the devotional, I’d been bed-ridden for going on a week, which has been fairly typical this past month. I am physically unable to open our home, prepare a meal, and have people over. This got me wondering. If hospitality is a directive for every believer, it must be possible for every believer. Do I, then, have a correct understanding of what hospitality is? What does it look like, especially in my given state? How can I do what He’s asking of me? I set out on a mission.

In my digging, I found out that the Greek word that’s translated in many versions of Scripture as “hospitality” is philoxenia.

philoxenia = phílos (“friend”) + xenos (“a stranger”) = warmth (friendliness) shown to strangers

This gave me a lot to think about and cleared so much up for me! Hospitality isn’t about having friends over, according to this context. Can it be about opening my home? Sure. But the focus here lies on “friendliness shown to strangers”, which can be done anywhere.

• It’s the friendly words and tone I use in writing an email to a staff member at my kids’ school.
• It applies to how I chat with the representative who still hasn’t answered my question after my repeating it clearly and in different ways, literally, eight times!
• It’s dealing with the cashier at the restaurant who seems a bit short on patience and kindness and needs some sent her way.
• It has everything to do with how I treat those in line at the grocery store who are taking forever and just forgot something they need to run back for.

Before looking into the meaning of “hospitality”, I would never have categorized any of the things above as such, but it appears to be and makes sense. These are things all believers can do, with the enabling of the Spirit of God, no matter where we are physically, financially, etc.

The Greek word before philoxenia is diṓkō.

diṓkō = “aggressively chase, like a hunter pursuing a catch (prize)“¹

This word can have a positive or negative meaning to it. In a negative context, it could be aggressively pursuing someone to persecute or hurt them. In a positive context, which Romans 12:13 is, it means that we’re to energetically chase after opportunities to be friendly to complete strangers.

How often do we do this? We may choose the right option if it’s placed in front of us, but do we hunt down opportunities to be friendly to someone we don’t know?

This week, pray about this and pursue opportunities (at least one) to be friendly to someone unfamiliar to you.

I’d love to hear about your experience! Give them a glimpse of Who God is! It may catch their attention and impact them for eternity.

_{¹“5381.Philoneksia.” Bible Hub, accessed on 16 July 2023, https://biblehub.com/greek/5381.htm.}